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Foto del escritorVanessa Pulgarin

F.R.I.E.N.D.S

Anyone who knows me know how much I love that tv show but this entry is not about that, although I will use some quotes from there… cuz you know, to write you need: UNAGI!!!


When I came to Ireland, never in a million years I would have thought I would be so lucky to find Sarita, my Italian sister, my flatmate, the Monica to my Rachel, the Joey to my Chandler. She is the kind of person who walks into a room and with her smile, she brightens it. I mean even my mum texts her when I “disappear”, she is THAT good… you could say: she will be there for me!


After 7 months living together, we have found the way to stay connected no matter what, through a text message, through a tag in a meme, in the morning while she is still asleep we talk, we share, we laugh… because that is what friends do… we can even stay silent but we are there. However, this I learned with the years.


Back in Ecuador I never had a “group of friends”. Don’t get me wrong, I still keep some friends but you know, when I was 22 all I cared was fun and only yesterday I was talking about how I used to go out on a Thursday night and still manage to attend the Fridays’ 8am lectures, dance on the club’s tables, drink my fears away and all in the same “circle” of friends. Now, I practically know nothing about those friends. I love them and keep a special place in my heart for them but we have changed, we have grown up and all in different directions and that is ok.


I also suddenly stopped being a shoe and I became a purse, or a hat! I have changed drastically and I love it! Cannot be any more proud of who I am today! I was welcome to the real world, it sucks, but I love it!!! I am so grateful for my new friends, those Ecuadoreans and those international ones that I will find the way to keep no matter what but because they matter to me!


Only a few days ago my best friend from high school texted me and said: “Vane wtf is happening?” And then we got to talk, caught up about my life and his last words in that chat were: “fly!” Then, another friend texted me the next day and he was like: “Vane… who’s that handsome guy smiling next to you and why haven’t I heard of him?” I said: “well JP, that’s my Irish gringo, I am happy, shut up!” and he said "Oh yes, you look happy too and I am happy for you!".


And that is how life goes on… I feel I have lost some friends here in Ireland too, not everyone is like me, not everyone will try to give an explanation or write their thoughts. Some are depressed but to be honest, I have been there, I have been diagnosed with clinical depression too, but one thing has always been clear to me… to be depressed does NOT fucking mean that you have to be a prick!!! Get yourself into others’ shoes and TRY TO UNDERSTAND!


Seriously, it is not that hard, it is empathy and it comes with trying to be a good human being!


It is evident I had a rough day today. I put myself out there, I tried to explain, I apologized for something I did not do but that might help someone I once cared about. I have given it a lot of thought in the last couple of hours but then I realized I do not need more because then it all becomes a moo point, you know... a cow’s opinion… it doesn’t matter, it’s moo!


So now, again, I’m just thankful, for each one of you that I’ve met and learnt from here in Ireland. Lectures are coming to an end but I am thankful for the lessons but mostly I am thankful for my Sarita, to whom I can always run into to tell her the good and bad news. Just yesterday I shared with her some very exciting news!!! 😊 aaaand… as Joey would say: Oh I am also thankful for thongs!


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